The New York Stock Exchange didn’t pick a particular direction going into the bell this morning. It just kind of floated about until something pushed it along but then even that was lukewarm at best. This is not the market environment I like and its marked slowness was proven when I looked at today’s Wall Street Journal and saw that the Dow had logged an aggregate of +55 points for the week prior.
When the market opened, I knew I should have just stayed away. But I felt the need to trade it so in stupid me fashion, I did and it ended up costing me. It wasn’t much but given how many times I tried to go back and forth looking for a substantial move, I pretty much sunk my PnL under the weight of commissions. Very stupid. I knew that I shouldn’t have done it and my mind was telling me to back off. I can’t be satisfied with the way I traded the cash open because that is capital that I will never get back and I am a stickler for capital. The other thing that I traded this morning was the British Pound and for all the waiting I did on that I only exited with a handful of ticks. I wish I could have gotten more but I just didn’t feel comfortable any longer with my reasons for being in those trades.
It is the first definitively cold day here in the East Coast for me. It was blustery this weekend but things eventually warmed up. I don’t think this will be the case for today – at least not overwhelmingly. I am getting tired of the cash open and its sluggish starts but I know that I have to be patient. I can’t really say today was productive but in the end I am glad I didn’t wreck my capital. It is hard to be thankful on days like this but I have to keep a grateful mindset. I didn’t say a positive as in the fake positive because I don’t believe in that. I believe that you have to allow yourself to get mad and use that emotion constructively. I’m not happy with my performance but I am thankful, not only for the risk provisions that I was given but for the opportunity to trade again tomorrow in this worthless good for nothing career.