77bdd6e367dfe91371285de6869c907bThe New York Stock Exchange opened up slowly but after a minute or so was semi-flooded with buy orders. It wasn’t a bad open at all – you had energy and fast price movement, things that you can build a trading strategy on whether its momentum or mean reversion: it was all there. I do not know where the market is right now as I type this but what I also noticed was that price action seemed to be independent of the local elections which, depending on the news channel you watch, were celebrated gloriously or mentioned as a footnote. Additionally, I wasn’t able to see anything in today’s Wall Street Journal because I decided I didn’t give a rat’s ballsack today.

I traded Cocoa today and that turned out well for me. I needed it because while I had a fairly decent turn trading the cash open, there was a point where I started to make shitty reads on the market and for whatever reason, kept pushing my luck when it was clear I wasn’t doing well. The result was that the commissions really put a dent into my PnL and if it hadn’t been for the Cocoa trades that I made, I would have closed up shop feeling really shitty about my lack of discipline. I don’t know why I just kept trading. Maybe there was a part of me that wanted to make up for yesterday. It’s odd and it’s not normal for me to do that. However, I am thankful that I caught myself and did what was necessary to keep a productive day into becoming a financial mudhole. I just took my winnings and wrapped it up.

I am thankful for today because it is hard to make money in this dumb business. Being able to close the desktop/laptop with green numbers gives a sense of pride that can’t be duplicated. But when I say pride, it’s not the dense, social-media-whoring type of pride. It’s more like a pride in one’s self and one’s identity. However, I would also be guilty of omission if I didn’t tell you that a part of me also feels relieved. I never take trading for granted because of the meta-arbitrary nature of it. There is never a true win in this business – only loss, and lots of it.

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